Last night was not a good night. Of the 26 ounces of cherry vodka in my cupboard, I drank about 18-20 of them. In about an hour’s time. And that just wasn’t a smart thing to do, especially for someone so new to drinking. Apart from my killer headache and my feeling like puking all day, I’m feeling a lot better tonight.
Hah. No I’m not.
So, tonight I remember the things that make me happy–the things I need to rediscover in my life.
I’d like to start off by saying I’m presently nourishing my lonliness with eggnog and cheesecake. These are things I love! But boy are they making me feel repulsive.
If I’d only had more time to myself tonight, next on my to-do list would be to push my couches together in front of the tv. The “boat”, we would call it when we were little. I would get my kittens settled in the boat, and I would turn on some Harvest Moon. A Wonderful Life is my absolute favourite, and I’ve been meaning to replay it, or at least finish the file I started some 6, 7, 8 years ago. But I also love my Animal Parade!!
Why I love Harvest Moon:
There is always happy music playing. Always. And I can marry the cutest guy and have him say sweet nothings to me every morning, even though it gets a little redundant. But hey, redundancy is bliss! Oh, and I get to whistle along to all the pretty melodies as I love and care for my children, crops, and animals. Who needs Zoloft when you have Harvest Moon!
After logging a few hours on Harvest Moon, I would then proceed to putting in my favourite movie or watching something on Netflix as I doodle or colour or something. I love the quiet evenings in, colouring by lamp light! So much pleasure is to be had!
Why I love drawing/colouring:
I’m very much into observing the progression of things. I love to see what old people looked like when they were young. I love to anticipate what young people will look like when they are old. I like to reflect on how dirty my apartment was before cleaning it. I like to close my book at random intervals and see how far along my bookmark has moved. I like to watch my piece of paper flourish in lines and colours. Progression makes me happy.
Next on the list, I would turn on some 2NE1 and break out into random dance at my favourite songs whilst preparing for bed. I am the Best, Follow Me, I Love You–any and all of them!
Why I love dancing:
Believe it or not, it is not an artistic expression, (all my artisitic capabilities are invested in my drawing–a.k.a. holy mother I’m a bad dancer) but rather a form of… exercise? I love the look and feel of my fatigued muscles. I feel great about myself after dancing around to awesome music.
And alas, I finally curl up in the boat with my kittens and fall asleep to Sailor Moon. Maybe my girls will be so tuckered out themselves at this point that they’ll actually let me snuggle them against my chest.
Why I love Sailor Moon:
This show is so endlessly uplifting. It always reminds me what it means to be a good person–and a strong person–no matter what the circumstances are. It makes me remember my past (nostalgia!!) and it makes me feel better about my present. Heck, maybe it even makes me hope for my future.
And these are things that make me happy. Who the hell even needs friends!